As weird as it may seem, this is officially the 500th entry into this column series.

I say “officially” because way more than 500 weeks have passed since this series began more than a decade ago, but for various reasons, some of those weeks simply didn’t include an entry to it.

Not that the fact there have been 500 of these things really matters. I realize that the existence of this series doesn’t affect much other than the time I spend working on it.

Yep, with or without this ongoing set of silliness, the division between people with differing mindsets would continue growing at the same rapid rate, the infiltration of falsehood into truth would be just as rampant, world affairs in general would be just as bad, great white sharks would still be scary, cheeseburgers would still be scrumptious and the Earth would still rotate on its axis and revolve around the neighborhood star.

But at the same time, I feel like it’s interesting to note that there have been 500 of these. That’s a pretty big number in almost every case; 500 people is a pretty sizable crowd, $500 is a pretty bug sum of money, 500 days is a fairly long time, 500 miles is quite a distance, swinging an ax 500 times would be very hard and 500 ticks – I don’t want to think about it.

And 500 is just a cool number. It’s half way to four figures and I think it’s safe to say it’s where numbers start to truly sound big.

As time has passed and the tally of entries into this series has increased, there have been hundreds upon hundreds of subjects involved.

I’ve often said that this column resembles what Jerry Seinfeld would say about his long-running TV sitcom: It’s about nothing. As I’ve also said, since it’s about nothing, there’s always something.

Along the way, virtually countless people, places and things have shown up. The list includes all manner of possibilities, including hard workers, deadbeats, amazing feats, strange facts, old sayings, predictions, speculations, lamentations, comedy, statistics, memories, oceans, earthquakes, volcanic eruptions, airplanes, insects, history, dogs, food, joy, sorrow, law enforcement, UFOs, mysterious monuments, covert government operations and far, far more.

You want diversity and inclusiveness? You’ll find them here (although not necessarily in the currently trendy and politically correct style, but rather in a more literal form).

Anyway, I’d like to say “thank you” to everyone who has had enough time to kill to actually read the entries in this series. Without you, it really would be nothing, and that’s really something.

That said, I can’t promise there will be another 500 (since none of us are even promised tomorrow), but I hope it’s God’s will that there will at least be some. And if there is, here’s an advance “thank you” to those of you who bother to read them.

Whatever the case, it will be interesting to see where this goes, and wherever that is, we’ll go there together.

Check this out: Before I wrote this sentence, the word count in this piece was 501 (minus the headline and postscript). That wasn’t planned, but it’s pretty cool.

Doug Davison

Doug Davison is a writer, photographer and newsroom assistant for the Houston Herald. Contact him by phone at 417-967-2000 or by email at

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